Daily Feline Prompt: A Feline Twist of Size

Tell us a story — fiction or non-fiction — with a twist we can’t see coming.

Fluffy and Tabby

“There is something wrong here.”

“Seems to me everything is normal Tabby.”

“No, it definitely isn’t. On the photo you are bigger than me.”

“Perhaps it was the plant I ate yesterday.”

“You mean it made you grow?”

“The ginger tom across the road gave it to me, said that it was full of feline vitamins which would make my whiskers grow.”

“And you believed him. Selkirk Rex felines do not have whiskers. They break after they poke through, every feline knows that.”

“But he said there was a special ingredient in the plant that only worked on Selkirk Rex felines, known as Selkirk joint.”

“Never heard of it Fluffy and your whiskers are still the same length.”

“But you said I had grown and am bigger than you on the photo.”

“You are, does he have any more of that joint stuff?”

“You can ask him, but he wants 500 grammes of catnip or a tin of tuna fish for it. I had to raid our supply of catnip, but it was worth it. I am now the biggest Selkirk Rex in the neighbourhood according to your description.”

“Fluffy, you are the only Selkirk Rex in the neighbourhood, so you have always been the biggest. And you mean there is no catnip left for me?”

“I am sure it will grow again Tabby.”

“Then stop rolling in it, otherwise it will not grow again.”

“Hello felines, how are we today, any problems or needs.”

“Morning Mrs. Human, silly question, we always have needs.”

“So Fluffy come down from the table, I want to take a photo of you with Tabby, but not on the table. The angle is wrong.”

“The angle is wrong?”

“Yes Tabby, it distorts the lens of my camera and Fluffy looks twice as large as usual. It is better I take a photo for one of your feline blogs where you sit in the garden relaxing paw in paw, then the proportions are normal.”

“Mrs. Human, we do not do paw in paw, I am me and Fluffy is well, a normal sized Selkirk Rex that has been swindled by a confidence trickster of a ginger tom and has Maine Coon illusions of size.”

Daily Feline Prompt: A Feline Twist of Size

Daily Feline Prompt: A Moment in Feline Time

What was the last picture you took? Tell us the story behind it. (No story behind the photo? Make one up, or choose the last picture you took that had one.)

Blue Tit

“We took a great photo there Tabby.”

“Yes Fluffy, it was good co-operation. I balanced the camera between your ears and pressed the button with my paw. Luckily those big cameras are paw friendly.”

“But the camera was heavy Tabby. I was glad when you were finished.”

“But Fluffy, you are blind, how do you know what is on the photo.”

“That is not important Tabby, I heard the bird munching at the seeds and fluttering with her wings now and again, so I knew you were taking a photo of our dinner.”

“She was a nice bird Fluffy, I think the humans call it a blue tit. It was a shame that Mrs. Human came out and took the camera away. Just when I was thinking about making the final pounce.”

“She is a spoil sport Tabby. Always intervenes when life gets interesting. Do you think your photo would be featured in the Feline Ornithological Calendar for this year.”

“It has a good chance Fluffy. I will upload it on my paw pad and mail it to the judges. I heard that Nera is on the jury this year, so we will have a good chance.”

“Oh yes, she always puts in a good word for us in Bastet’s ear. What is the prize if we get into the calendar.”

“A weeks holiday in the eternal corn chambers as apprentice mouse catcher to Nera.”

“Fun, do you think Mrs. Human will mind if we disappear for a week.”

“We might not win, I heard that the ginger tom from next door took a photo of that naked cat next door with a butterfly in its mouth. Apparently it is favoured for its artistic value.”

“Artistic value. I thought the culinary values were rated higher, who cares if it looks good, as long as it tastes good.”

“That is true Fluffy, I think we could begin packing our cat trays for the journey.”

Daily Feline Prompt: A Moment in Feline Time

Nera’s Revenge

Me and computer

<“Nera cat, what are you doing with my camera in your paw. No, no photo. I am not looking my best at the moment.”

“Mrs. Human, you know what. I don’t care, and neither to my feline apartment sharers here. We are being photographed in all sorts of positions. We might be having a quiet lick in a corner, perhaps curled up and sleeping or just birdwatching. They are private moments in a cat life and there is Mrs. Human with the camera, taking advantage of our innocence.”

“Nera, you don’t have to exaggerate. My friends all over the world just love to see photos of such a wonderful silky furred cat like yourself. ”

“No Mrs. Human, flattery will get you nowhere. When I think of the photo you posted last week showing me in a private situation. That was completely embarrassing. Just be glad that my photo is only showing a stupid human with a fixed stare into a computer terminal. No telling what you was doing when I was taking the photo. Probably telling an extremely embarrassing story about me and my feline colleagues. So now it is your turn. How do I switch the flashlight on Mrs. Human.”

“Nera, forget the flashlight. Your paws are too clumsy for such a delicate instrument.”

“They are not clumsy, I can do things with my paws that you cannot do with your hands.”

“Such as?”

“Holding onto the wall or a tree trunk when I am climbing, or having a good scratch on a post somewhere.”

“Nera, humans do not climb up walls ande trees or scratch on posts.”

“No, but they use their hands to type on computers spreading stories about their feline owners.”

I gave up – so here is the result of Nera’s photo efforts.