“Tabby, the sun is shining.”
“Big deal.”
“I thought you would like to go outside and enjoy the sparkles of the weather, and how the sun relects on the snow.”
“Snow? You mean that cold white stuff that lays on the ground, and gives me cold paws. I don’t think so, and I do not like sparkles, they make my eyes get smaller. And who needs sparkles. I was just settling down to a relaxing sleep in the bathroom. You do have funny ideas sometimes Mrs. Human.”
“But you are sleeping your life away.”
“Of course I am, and I enjoy every minute of it. It is my hobby, my joie de vivre, the reason for my existence. It is a far far better thing I do when I sleep then I have ever done. Are you bored Mrs. Human?”
“Of course not, why?”
“Because when you are bored you think too much and make stupid suggestions. If you really want to do something useful, you could begin to write my list of Catmas wishes. I am still waiting for my Swarovski diamond embedded cat flap door and what about my Versace designed food bowl?”
“I was thinking more of a new sleeping cushion.”
“Yes, a good idea, but not one of those silly colourful cushions in syntheitic material, something worthy of my position in life: yes, a mink cushion.”
“They do not sell them at the store Tabby.”
Or course not, you can order one online with the credit card. There are still at least 20 shopping days to Catmas, and it is better to be in time.”
“What about my Christmas present Tabby?”
“I am thinking about it. Perhaps a new tin opener for my tuna fish.”
“But that would not be something for me.”
“Of coure not. Christmas does not exist in meow Mrs. Human.”
The Cat Chronicles 