It’s a cats’ life. Let’s go to the vets.

Fluffy at the vets

Yes, it was time for the annual visit to the vet for the feline jabs. As we have three cats, we have to split it. We had Nera done at first to get the worst behind us, Tabby and Fluffy are no problem.

“Excuse me Mrs. Human, but I heard that last remark. Are you insinuating that I am a problem feline”. Nera was meowing rather loudly.

“No Nera, but you must admit that when we take Tabby and Fluffy, we don’t have to go to the doctors afterwards for a Tetanus jab. I had to go when I took you about eight years ago, and Mr. Human had to go last week after you turned your head and bit him in the thumb for no reason at all. Not to mention the many scratch marks he had on his arms. That was not exactly combined with no problems.”

“Mrs. Human that was a normal feline reaction. We do not like to be handled as if we were a piece of meat. We have feelings, in our tender parts, and having a needle, no three needles, jabbed into you back is to be met with resistance and warfare. That stands in the book of Bast.” and Nera accompanied the last remark with a stamp of her paw to prove her point.

“Then tell me Nera, why did Fluffy not complain. She just sat still and let her temperature be measured and accepted the jabs with no problem. She is an example to how a good feline should be. No fuss, brave and obedient.”

Nera glared at me if looks could kill and then she once again opened her mouth.

“Mrs. Human, Fluffy lacks a certain feline respectful attitude. Selkirk Rex are very gullible felines, a fluke of nature. Or he thinks like a canine, believing that all human things are perfect. He probaby thinks that it is all for his own good. And what is worst, the vet now thinks that felines are subordinate.”

“But Nera, look how  brave Fluffy was when he had his temperature measured.”

Fluffy having temperature taken

“No hiss, no loud miaow and above all no scratching or biting. He just sat there like a good feline. He deserves an extra portion of tuna for that.”

Did I noticed a red glare in Nera’s yellow globes?

“Hissssss, Mrs. Human. She is a disgrace to the feline nation. I just hope that my litter sister Tabby kept some pose at the vets and maintained our reputation as a species to be respected.”

“Well, sort of Nera” I said. She did give a little resistance to having her injections.”

Tabby gets a jab

“Well done Tabby, at least you showed them what felines are made of.”

“Not quite Nera. The lady vet grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and held me down. I was powerless, lamed, no chance. Then her slave jabbed the needle in my tender part. I had already been through a temperature test. Having a thermometer inserted in your most tender part is not exactly refreshing. Afterwards she looked in my ears, which was an insult. I always clean my ears every day. Then she examined my wonderful pointed sharp teeth. To end all insults they decided to see how heavy I was and put me on the scales. By then I was exhausted, my pride was damaged and I had no fighting strength left.”

“Tabby, but you did try to sink your wonderful pointed fangs into her hand, just to leave your mark behind.”

“Really Nera, I wanted to, but there was no chance. She was holding my neck all the time.”

Nera was quite annoyed and her meow was more hiss than anything else.

“Felines I am ashamed. Today you went into battle and I expected a victory over the vet species. Instead you just  let them do what they wanted. Our feline respect has been damaged, how can we hold our head up high after this defeat. Now I know how Napoleon’s feline felt after losing the battle of Waterloo. Totally dejected. I will need time to conquer this feeling of despair.”

Nera even had tears in her eyes, she was ashamed. Then Fluffy spoke up

“Nera we never had a chance. Tabby and I are just not as brave and strong as you are. We now have another year, and I am sure you will train us to be as courrageous as you are and conquer the evil vet and her slave.”

“Of course, Fluffy” answered Nera “and what about you Tabby?”

“Anything you say Nera, after all you are the leader of the pack.”

Mr. Human put another plaster on his scratches and rubbed his thumb and I thought we are going to have fun next year when we go on the annual visit to the vets. Next time I think we will take each one separately.

Creative Challenge 234: Sway

Nera

“I am doing this one Mrs. Human. I am such a modest feline and no-one really can appreciate my talents. So I will write a little about myself for a change.”

“Nera I never really put you into the shy category. You mean we have not recognised your qualities. I am so sorry. Of course, now you have the chance to show how good you are.”

“Mrs. Human, are you sure about this?” It was Nera’s sister Tabby, born in the same litter.

“”Of course Mrs. Human is sure” said Nera. “Now I have the chance to show what a genius I am.”

“For example Nera?” asked Tabby.

“I organise things here, otherwise you and Fluffy would make a complete chaos. I always taste the tuna fish first, to ensure that it is edible.”

“Yes Nera” answered Fluffy. “The problem is you eat it all and there is not enough for us all. Tabby or I have to tell Mrs. Human to serve some more. We all have our own dish, but you eat all the dishes.”

“Fluffy, it is for your own safety. I am risking my life for your benefit. What if the tuna fish is bad. Then I am the one to suffer, not you or Tabby.”

“But Nera the tuna fish is never bad. Mrs. Human always makes sure it is fresh and safe to eat.” said Tabby.

“That is a triviality Tabby. I am very generous and looking after your welfare and Fluffy’s. You should be more grateful.”

“Of ourse” Nera continued “it is a well known fact that I am the most beautiful and graceful cat in the neighbourhood. My body sways so delicately when I move, it is the real poetry in motion. Stop laughing behind your paw Tabby. This is a serious matter.”

“Sorry Nera, but I have not yet read the poem that would describe your movements.”

“If I may say so” added Fluffy “Nera reminds me more of a large ship on a rough sea, her swaying movments exist it is true, but a ship sways as well when it sails over the ocean in a storm.”

“A very good description Fluffy, as if Nera was perhaps carrying too much weight? As if she would be carrying too much cargo?”

“Yes, exactly Tabby, perhaps she should eat less?”

“Tabby, Fluffy, do you both have a death wish? Hisssss! I have the pefect feline figure. There is not a morsel of fat on my bones, it is all fluff. Genuine wonderful fur, like silk, that shines in the sunlight It can almost be blinding with such a wonderful reflection.”  Nera was annoyed that her beauty and talents had not been honoured by her fellow felines.

“Admittedly you do have more fur than Fluffy or me” said Tabby “and it is true that everyone adores your wonderful long fur. It is a comfortable place and attractive for snails, ants, earwigs and even tics. It is true” continued Tabby “you are admired by many living creatures. They just seem to get attached to you.”

“Are you insinuating that my luxury fur is a home for insects.” and Nera lifted her hind leg and scratched behind her ear.
.
“Oh no, Nera, Tabby and I would never say that, but Mrs. Human sometimes has a problem if a tic, after having its dinner, sort of drops to the floor in our home and she might  tread on it and squash it. She finds it a bit messy having blood on the white tiles.”‘

“Mrs. Human is just a sensitive homo sapiens and does not recognise the qualities of being a feline.”

“But Mrs. Human says that she does not like cutting the dried up snails out of your fur. You have to go to the vets once a year for a hair cut, and he even has to put you to sleep when he is doing it.”

“Do not get personal Fluffy. I have to put up with your rastafari dreadlocks. Not normal for a feline, and don’t come with the Selkirk Rex excuse. Just a freak of nature. Now what you see on me is 100% genuine. Jelousy can be so annoying, but I understand. It is just not every feline that has the gift of being so beautiful as myself. ”

“Are you finished with your blog Nera, can I upload it”

“Of course Mrs. Human, I think I have included the most important thing. Do you think my photo does me justice or shall I put another one in the blog.”

“Perhaps a second photo would be a good idea.”

“No problem Mrs. Human, we will choose one to honour the beauty of our chief cat Nera” said Tabby and Fluffy together, and here it is. Nera was not actually pleased with the choice, but that is another discussion.

Nera

Clean Slate

Explore the room you’re in as if you’re seeing it for the first time. Pretend you know nothing. What do you see? Who is the person who lives there?

Nera at the top, Fluffy below

“Mrs. Human I think you can leave this one to us, Me, Nera the chief cat, my assistant Tabby and apprentice Fluffy. Human imagination is just not equipped for this sort of thing. You have been here for some time and take everything for granted. Your ideas on this would be just boring and useless.”

“But Nera, I thought felines have short, or even no memories.”

“Exactly Mrs. Human, just as I said. We see the human living room new every day.”

“Nera, humans are just like dogs. They obey but do not ask questions. We felines take a message and think about it” Tabby remarked.

“I cannot even see, I think, but this room smells differently every day according to the atmospherics” which was Fluffy’s view on things.

“Felines, are you sure about this, I mean you have been living here for many years.”

“Mrs. Human, no problem” answered Nera. “We do not live here, it is our existence, our life, our state of mind. Humans just live here, but they have no depth.”

“Nera this conversation is getting a little too advanced for my simple human brain.”

“Exactly, so let us get on with it. OK, Nera.”

“Of course Tabby. Let us begin.”. Nera decided to lead the discussion being the chief feline in the group.

“This morning when I awoke I took a morsel of food and entered the so called living room. It was different.”

“Just what I was going to say Nera.”

“Fluffy Selkirk Rex felines should be seen and not heard, and you being blind I ask myself what you saw.”

“Nera I still do not know what this blind thing is. Of course I see everything. This morning the living room smelt different, sort of a strange whiff in the air.”

“That was because Mrs. Human took a walk with the noise machine which sucks so-called dust. I think she calls it a vacuum cleaner. It always smells different afterwards according to what she has sucked up with it.” Tabby was quite proud of her answer.

“Correct Tabby” said Nera.

“You see felines, I am not so stupid as you think” was Fluffy’s reaction.

“And the room is completely new and different after the sucking operation. My favourite chair has moved nearer to the table. I had to paw around until I found it.” Fluffy continued.

“I know, typical Human. They have the impression that everything is much cleaner after the vacuum thing, but the smell is not the same and the furniture is not according to our feline habits. Tabby, write down that we felines see this room with new eyes every day due to no consideration from the human species.” Nera stamped her paw to emphasise her remark.

“Nera, shall I use the computer or the PawPad to write it all down.”

“You have to use the computer Tabby, because you have to save it all and post it to that bloggy site thing.”

“But the PawPad is easier.”

“Do I have to do everything myself?”

“OK Nera, but I might make a few mistakes.”

“Why am I surrounded by idiots?”

“Nera I am not an idiot, I am your chief assistant. And talking of seeing the room completely new, Mrs. Human cleaned the glass table with that smelly stuff. The one she sprays everywhere. Gets up my nose and makes me sneeze.”

“I heard Tabby, couldn’t close my eyes for a deep sleep because of the noise you were making.”

“Ok, Nera I am writing – Mrs. Human sprayed the table and the fumes got into my throat and nose. The table now smells like something else and Nera could not sleep.” Tabby was quite pleased with her work and typed it all carefully into the computer.

“I have an idea felines. Shall I do some spraying around the room to give it a better atmosphere. Something more feline, and to show the Humans who really owns this place.” It seems Fluffy has some good ideas now and again.

“Fluffy that was brilliant, but I just have a feeling that Mr. and Mrs. Human would not be very happy. There might be loud voices and a new unknown smell from some sort of strong cleaning liquid. They do not always understand our feline requirements. Our recycling process has been restricted to a box with special sand when we are indoors and they seem to think that the spraying operation should only take place out of doors.”

“But we masculine felines love to spray Nera” said Fluffy.

“I know Fluffy, but not inside. And as far as masculine or female is concerned, that was one change we all had many years ago, so do not expect any understanding from the human race if you start to spray to keep everything under feline control.” That seemed to be Nera’s final word.

Mrs. Human entered the room.

“So felines, have you written something for this Daily Prompt?”

“We are just finished Mrs. Human.”

“Can I read it?”

“Too late Mrs. Human” said Tabby “I have just uploaded it onto the web site.”

Chronicles of an Anglo Swiss

Do you have a favorite quote that you return to again and again? What is it, and why does it move you?

two yellow tits

It seems that Mrs. Human has a lapse of creativity today, so I, chief cat Nera, will take over this prompt. Mrs. Human just has no favourite quote. She has many according to the situation she finds herself in, mostly being quotes not fit for either feline or human ears. We cats only have a couple, as our situations follow mainly the same pattern. “If it moves, appeals to the feline taste buds, kill it and eat it”.

“Nera, what are you writing on your paw pad. That is not the idea of a daily prompt.”

“You said I should take over today as you have no inspiration. I and my two feline colleagues here at home always have inspiration, especially since you fixed up the bird eating…

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Creative Challenge: Nature

Nera waiting for the bird

“Nera, you have been sitting on that damp earth for at least an hour. What is so interesting?”

“Mrs. Human, if you ask a feline a silly question, you will get a silly answer.”

“What is so silly about that question?”

“Mrs. Human you have hung a food tray in front of our delicate feline noses for the birds and I am waiting for a bird to arrive within food range.”

“But Nera, they arrive all the time for food from the bird house.”

“Mrs. Human I mean my food range.”

Another one of those pointless discussions with Nera, the chief cat, but I persevered with my human logic.

“Nera the birds are tabu for you and your fellow cats. They are not a supplementary source to your usual natural diet of vitamin packed pellets.”

“You can keep you vitamin packed pellets, nothing like a nice little crunchy bone covered with juicy meat. You humans have no idea. It is a feline’s nature to chase birds. You cannot imagine the triumphant feeling we have when we feel the bird between our paws.”

“Nera I can only imagine the feeling that the bird has being part of a feline meal. No, forget it.”

“Tabby, Fluffy come here, Mrs. Human is being illogical once again. She does not understand the basic laws of nature.”

Tabby came running across the garden. When Nera calls, her words are to be obeyed. Fluffy awoke from his sleep and was ready to obey Nera’s commands.

“Are you having human problems?” asked Tabby and Fluffy. “Is Mrs. Human doubting the laws of the feline nature once again?”

“Felines, I am not doubting any laws, I am just telling you that birds are not a supplement to your healthy and plentiful diat.

“I don’t remember Bast feeding his team in the corn chambers on pellets Mrs. Human” said Tabby.

“The felines were in the corn chambers for a reason. They kept the plague of vermin under control so that the corn was kept safe for human consumption. The felines were there to kill the rats and mice, which is their nature.”

“It is also our nature to kill and eat birds Mrs. Human” said Fluffy.

“Well said Fluffy, you are learning very well. You are now apprentice first class.”

“Thank you Nera, I like a morsel of poultry now and again.”

I gave up.

The arrival of Tabby